Tuesday, January 29, 2008

I wish this week was over!

WARNING!!I rant and rave a bit in this one!!

I am having a really tough week. I am firstly missing my boyfriend terribly but most of all I am really angry with my guy friends who are also my house mates. We leave for South Africa next Monday but two of the boys thought it would be a great idea to go skiing a week before we are leaving. So they knew this very well in advanced but left there rooms in a big mess and hardly anything packed. They are due to come back on Sunday when we are doing the handover of our rental house. They are not coming home till the afternoon so I have no idea when they thought they were going to pack because I will have to do the whole handover. I got a call today and it is now changed to Saturday as the person doing it does not work on Sunday. So they have there keys, so they will have to organise how to get it to them.

I was furious when I came home on Saturday evening to find every pot and pan used and plates galore with food caked on. I have been staying at my girlfriends for the last few nights before this so i was not expecting a dirty house as I cleaned before I went to hers. The boys then left early Sunday morning. Nothing got done on Saturday as it was Oz day and we went to an aussie pub to celebrate with all other aussies in england! They also had quite a few drinks and when I got home at 8 they were already in bed!!

So the last few days I have been cleaning and scrubbing and dusting and you name it, i have done. I have never meet lazier boys in my life and who live like ferrals in their rooms. My room was upstairs and had an ensuite so I never went down stairs much to their rooms. It was so gross, there was mould on the doors as well.

Anyways I have finished it all now and nearly packed all my stuff. I can't wait to one of my other housemates comes home tonight as he has been in Dublin with his gf.

Food and exercise has been spot on this week. I had a few small choccies last night but that is all. My exercise has been my saviour as it is my stress release, and I have been doing something of the best runs and weight workouts!! I have decided to stop weighing myself so much as quite often the scales would determine what day I would have depending if i lost weight or i had put on. This way I go on how I am feeling and how my clothes look and feel. So far it has been working really well.

I will probably have time to write one more post before I leave for south africa. Sorry for ranting and raving. It helps to get it all out!!

have a great rest of the week


Sunday, January 20, 2008

Well I can't believe that over half of january is over and I have only written one post. Ben left over a week ago now and took his laptop with him so checking my blog has been a bit of a struggle. I have been however reading everyone's blogs as much as possible. I am missing Ben like crazy but it 5 weeks till i see him now.

I have had a great year so far. My running is going great guns and have been running about 8-10km three times a week, 2 5km runs a week with intervals and about 4 weight training sessions. So I have been really impressed with myself. I am really keen to do a half marathon in September and have been thinking about doing training for some triathons when I get home too. We will see.

Had a few low days last week when I just felt really down about myself in general. I think it was a combination of missing ben, getting a bit scared about being so white and fitting into my bikini and just the uncertainity of how i am going to feel when going back home. I have thinking heaps about how I perceive myself to others. I really think I come across as a really confident, strong young women who knows what I want but deep down I really am a bit of a shambles but am building this to be a place where i am content with myself. Every day i struggle with body issues but am really focusing on positive thinking and the right attitude this year to help me over these issues. I am not going to let the weight on scales to determine my fortune and how i am feeling. I really am getting anxious about my work when i get home as it will be crunch time to decide if this is the career i want to endevour. I am trying not to think about this too hard at the moment as I really need to wait till i get back home to sort this out. So as you can se I have been doing a bit of soul searching. One of my closest friends come back from perth this week too so she has been shedding some positive feedback to me as well, some constructive stuff and some really positive things that I needed to hear as well. She is really a great friend who gives very honest advice and has been there to help me through some tougher times.

So after all that rambling I am feeling positive. I am going to have a great eating week, great exercise week, great feeling week and enjoying only working 3 days!!!

Have fun

Love Aims

Monday, January 07, 2008

Welcome 2008

One of many beautiful spots in Caribbean

Me in Chamonix

Ben and I in Paris

I know I am very late with this post but I thought better late than never. I have been reflecting over my last year and it has been one that I will remember for the rest of my life. I have achieved so many fabulous things, seen some amazing sights, meet some fabulous people who will now be friends for life and have discovered more about myself than a very long time.

The list of places that I have been too has extended from places in Australia and NZ to pretty much every continent in the world. So many people have asked where my favourite place has been and I would have to say Paris and the Caribbean. Paris is just so amazing. There is a place for everybody. There is the history, the museums, the art, the shopping and the food!!!! I have dined at some amazing restaurants when Ben's parents came over in September. The Caribbean was also incredible. It was a hard life for those 6 weeks that we just sailed from island to island watching the cricket and building a fantastic tan. My life in these six weeks was so simple and easy without a care in the world. The places traveled on Contiki will be an experience that will also never be forgotten.

As you know I was skiing over Christmas. It was fantastic. It was quite different being away from family at this time and did feel a bit homesick but in saying this I will never forget it. We had a big Christmas dinner cooked by all 9 of us that went, played in the snow in the afternoon and laughed and drank merrily. I have become more confident on the ski's since the last time (12 years ago). I did manage to do a massive fall and get some big bruises and a very sore elbow but that didn't stop me from getting back up.

As for my personal development this year I have been faced to deal with my many emotions about my body and the way I feel about it. I know I will have a continual battle but I must admit I have had fewer back steps this year than from the last few. I had times when I felt ugly and fat but I now look back at photos and think I must have been crazy. I looked good but was just in a complete denial. I am learning to love myself for me in the present time and not to critise myself so much. My boyfriend has been a saviour and he is always helping me through some tough times and is always there for me. I love him heaps and I don't think he really knows how much it means to have the continual love and support that he gives me as he is one of the few people who really knows what mental battles I go through.

So for this year I hope for it to be an impressive one. I arrive back in Perth in late February after being to South Africa. My boy starts his new job in January and I am so happy for him. I will miss him heaps for the 6 weeks we are separated but I know it won't be long before seeing him. I am going to sort out my career path and decide if podiatry is what I want to do and go into partnership or if something else is in the making. I am going to run the half marathon back home in September and become more confident in my appearance and self with little baby steps along the way.

So to all of you Happy New Year!!

Lots of love Amy