I have not blogged in such a long time but my head really hasn't been in the best place of late. I have been reading people's blogs though and I really admire all these people who have worked really hard to where they are now. I have lapsed in a way that I haven't done for a very long time and now trying to dig myself out of all these negative thoughts. I have had the best year travelling but I am still so unhappy with certain things in my life.
Number one being work. I am not enjoying it, especially over here in the UK. I think it is a combination of the travel, the monotonomous of the jobs that i have been given and the lack of the challenege. I wish the days away and I hate this. At the moment it money and when I go back home next year I am going to seriously think hard about a career change.
Number two being my body image. This has been a problem for a number of years. I have played mind games with myself for as long as I can remember and they always get me down and really upset. I have decided I really need to get in control of this issue otherwise it is really going to affect me forever. I have decided to take one day at a time and blog at least every second day with my exercise, eats and general feelings for the day. This way I hope to see any patterns to how I am feeling. I am at a gym and eating relatively well. I have been really ill the last two weeks- first with a stomach bug that wiped me out for 4 days (couldn't keep any food down and my appetite was nil) and I am now on antibiotics for a bad dose of tonsilits which has had me in bed for another 4 days. I have felt so rotten. Over this time I have hardly eaten but then again I have hardly moved! I have really missed home since I have been sick but I guess this to be expected.
So from today expect to read a lot more about me and if I stop writing it probably means I have had a downward spiral and just need to be picked up again. Hopefully this will not happen.
So today:
Exercise will be a short walk just to get moving again as I am still feeling very average but just need to stretch the legs.
Food: It is only 11am here so I have eaten protein pancakes this morning so far
Till tomorrow...
Aims
xxxx
1 comment:
Hi Amy, Lovely to see you back - knew you had been reading from my site stats and was wondering how you were going. You're right, so much about how we behave and what we think about ourselves, all comes from within ourselves. If we can get our heads in the right place it all seems to come together - this from someone who is more than double your age and still often struggles to find that place!! But you're recognizing it early in life and so have a great opportunity to work out exactly what pushes your buttons (or doesn't) and can work out a plan going forward. Good luck and look forward to hearing how it's all going. Z xx
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